Have you ever wanted to change a habit that is holding you back? It might be snacking at night, being the one to always arrive last to meetings, or speaking over people. It could even be the habit of coming home and still being “at work” rather than with your family.
Most of us have bad habits. One of mine right now is scrolling through Instagram at night, just before bed, which is undoubtedly the worst time to do this. I know it’s not supporting me and yet, I still do it.
Our habits are fascinating, and at times, extremely frustrating.
In this post, I want to share some insights that I have found helpful. I’m sure you’ll agree, there is a lot to be gained from understanding how to overcome bad habits and instead, creating healthy habits for both career and life outside work.
Malcolm Gladwell said, “Practice isn’t the thing you do once you’re good. It’s the thing you do that makes you good”.
We all have habits. From the way we tidy the kitchen to how we take notes in a meeting, or even clean our teeth. Every day we make over 35,000 decisions. If we had to evaluate and consciously think about each and every one of those decisions, we’d be left exhausted. Our habits are like little mental shortcuts that help us make decisions and move through life.
There is nothing more frustrating than being stuck in a bad habit loop. Charles Duhigg has written a book on this and explains that the loop comprises three parts: The Cue, The Routine and The Reward.
The Cue: This is the trigger that starts your habitual behaviour.
The Routine: This is the habit itself or what you do.
The Reward: This is what the behaviour does for you. The reward reinforces the habit of being on repeat.
Consider my Instagram habit. I am relaxing in front of the TV with no responsibilities. Sitting on that couch is a mental trigger that prompts me to pick up my phone and start scrolling. I do this, and Instagram feeds me, so I am rewarded. Duhigg’s habit loop is a nifty framework that helps us understand why we get stuck.
I recently had the pleasure of interviewing Dr Gina Cleo, a leading expert on habit change, for my Your Brilliant Career podcast.
Gina eloquently explained, that to overcome any lousy habit, you need to start with awareness and finish with ongoing accountability. Here are her three recommended steps to habit change.
Awareness – Gina reminds us that every habit, whether helpful or unhelpful, has a reward, and we need to recognise this. We can do this by checking in with ourselves and being mindful of our actions and thoughts, particularly around those trigger moments. The awareness helps us get off autopilot and make a more informed decision about engaging in that same routine.
Commit to small changes – Gina states, “numerous studies show that large or complex changes are not only more difficult to achieve, but they are more difficult to sustain, compared with small, simple changes. Creating tiny habits adds to lifestyle changes much more effectively than trying to create big changes“. For me, this could be tweaking my evening routine a few nights a week, so I start to break the pattern of picking up the phone. Two nights a week, I will leave the phone in another room. The other nights I will allow myself to scroll to my heart’s content. I then increase my commitment to make more changes as the weeks unfold, so I can arrive at a place where it is not a daily habit anymore, but rather an intentional decision.
Track our progress – Like anything we commit to, we need to keep ourselves accountable. Gina suggests a habit diary where we capture the things we are noticing. This helps us get better at identifying the triggers. She also explains that doing this doubles our chances of achieving our goals.
If you need to dial up your efforts to bring about a change of habit in your career or personal life, consider this question:
If you continue this habit for the next five, ten or twenty years, what impact will it have on you?
One thing I’ve learned through my own experience and through conversations with many of the fabulous participants in my women’s leadership programs, is that great careers take real motivation. So, if there’s a habit that doesn’t fit your future self-image, then maybe it’s time to COMMIT and see what’s possible for you.
Now that’s an exciting prospect.